Super Psycho Love: The DomCom
Amongst the cacophonous flurry of online discussions, one thing keeps pitching its tent in my head…a lot of this chatter is sounding overwhelmingly conservative. There’s an Amish essence in the air, a group barn restoration of shame is being carried throughout the nation, and there’s only one remedy: the DomCom.
Image Credit: FilmGrab
The DomCom is a subgenre of the RomCom with a focus on sex, sexuality, and power. Domination, submission, giving into oneself or another, letting go of binaries, these are the foundations of the DomCom. The 2002 film, Secretary, being the cornerstone for what a DomCom should be.
Secretary follows Lee Holloway, idiosyncratically played by Maggie Gyllenhaal, who begins a sexual, sadomasochistic relationship with her employer Mr. Grey, played by James Spader. Yep, this movie has the original Mr. Grey. Although the film can be quite humorous at times, Lee’s journey throughout the film is not played for laughs, rather Secretary legitimizes the power behind going through your own sexual revolution. Swaying between dominance and submission, Lee comes of age. She gains confidence, takes what she wants, becomes a whole person. Secretary showcases the underrepresented, and often taboo, power of submission and sexual liberation.
Image Credit: FilmGrab
The taboo nature of the DomCom is why the subgenre remains underseen, underappreciated, and frankly, undermade. In recent years, I can only name 3 DomComs that have broken into the zeitgeist. Those being Sanctuary, Babygirl, and Dogs Don’t Wear Pants.
An important thing to note is that none of these films hold a score of over 3.5 on Letterboxd. Why is that? All of these films are extremely well made, each one critically praised for their brazen writing, bold storytelling, and domineering lead performances, yet somewhere along its way to general audiences, the DomCom crosses a silent safe word.
Where is this arbitrary line when depicting sexuality? What are the hard limits to sex in media? What is the socially acceptable way to do the deed?
Image Credit: Pitchfork
Man’s Best Friend, Sabrina Carpenter’s 2025 album, was a recent depiction of “bad” sexuality to general audiences. Controversy regarding the album’s sexually submissive cover art started almost immediately upon release, and from all sides of the conversation. Some critics saw it as pandering to the male gaze, some saw it as a regressive form of satire, some just flat out slut-shamed Carpenter, writing off her music as sexual drivel.
Carpenter had just come off of a stellar year in 2024, dominating the charts with pop songs full of innuendo, so what exactly crossed the line here with Man’s Best Friend. Why can we sing and bat our eyelids about sex, but when it’s touched upon with sincerity and not jest, we get flaccid. It’s okay when it’s a joke, a fun chorus to hum to, but when it’s done with a touch more nuance, we grow uncomfortable.
Image Credit: IMDB
I think we’d all like to say we are open-minded people regarding sexuality. We all pretend to be smooth as butter and casual about sex, but every now and again, don’t we wonder about another’s body count. Don’t we swap stories and daydream over a stranger’s private life all knowing how taboo this line of thinking is.
The DomCom puts a face to the name. It displays every crevice of human, predominantly female, sexuality and relishes in the ecstasy of the shameful.
Away with faceless guilt! Away with puritanical contrition! Away with conservative complacency! The DomCom stretches the line of what is acceptable, and isn’t that what good art is for? How will we ever change if there’s nothing to challenge us?
With Harry Lighton’s Pillion and Gregg Araki’s I Want Your Sex slated to premiere in 2026, the DomCom does not seem to be going anywhere, and I for one am excited about that. The future of cinema is bright, and a little turned on too.
Strike Out,
Ariel Rivera
Miami
Ariel Rivera is a senior at Florida International University, majoring in Media Communications with a minor in English Studies. Rivera is passionate about expanding on current, hot-button cultural moments that may seem frivolous at first glance, but which, through his unique point of view, become pillars of discussion. A self-described crazy film nerd, Rivera enjoys watching and reviewing movies in his free time, as well as reading and lounging with his dog, Neo.
