“Women Are Emotional”: How Today’s Female Indie Acts Are Embracing the Sexist Stereotype
Put a finger down if you’re a woman who has hidden her emotions to avoid being perceived as hysterical. I know I have. I’ll set my pride aside and admit I often dismiss my emotional struggles to not burden others, in fear of not being loved and falling short of people’s expectations. Scared of being seen as anything less than strong and perfect, I try to portray myself as someone who has her life together, only to fall apart in the arms of my bedroom every night.
We're all guilty of avoiding emotional expression to appease others. Unlearning archaic sexist standards society has endlessly hammered into our heads is not easy, so don’t feel ashamed. Growing up, you may have been told to strive for perfection, to carry yourself confidently, to be happy – because what’s more unnerving than a woman who openly expresses her emotions?
Female indie acts Lili Trifilio of the band Beach Bunny and Beabadoobee exemplify the formidable power of women’s emotions. Their latest albums, released in July 2022, carved storylines that explored their flawed thinking, obsessive behaviors and overwhelming vulnerability. Combining their difficult confessions with addictive guitar riffs and dreamy pop elements, Lili Trifilio and Beabadoobee have blazed a path for us women to reclaim and express our emotions without shame.
Image Courtesy: @beachbunnymusic on Instagram
Beach Bunny’s Emotional Creature and Beabadoobee’s Beatopia are two sides of the same coin. Emotional Creature explores Lili Trifilio’s all-consuming desire for love, while Beatopia reflects on Beabadoobee’s former relationship. The albums’ candidness about unhealthy thoughts and behaviors is admirable. The lyrics, as frank and unedited as hand-written diary confessions, plunge us into the darkest chasms of their worlds. For many of us, these albums force us to confront our flawed sides, our fears and mistakes.
Image Courtesy: @beachbunnymusic on Instagram
On Emotional Creature, Trifilio paints her heartfelt thoughts and pivotal experiences in excruciating detail. Take the song, “Weeds,”: Trifilio opens up about clinging to tiny buds of affection, hoping they will bloom into fairytale-like romances. In “Deadweight,” an angry Trifilio reveals how she stayed friends with an ex-lover, expecting their relationship to rekindle, but was used by him to only satisfy his needs. Her crooning reveals that, while craving and seeking love is natural, our tireless expedition for it can lead us to mistake superficial moments for sincere connections.
The topics discussed in Emotional Creature are universal experiences, but these moments can feel embarrassing, causing us to fool ourselves into believing that we're special cases. Yearning for attention, shutting the world out when you’re in love, running away from your problems — these are all normal occurrences. Sometimes all we need is empathy, and Emotional Creature is the best prescription.
Image Courtesy: @radvxz on Instagram
Beabadoobee also embraces self-confrontation as an opportunity to learn from her past. In her song, “See You Soon,” she shares how she ignored her boyfriend’s needs, which contributed to their break-up. In “Perfect Pair,” which went viral on TikTok, Beabadoobee reveals how the communication issues in her then-relationship led to tension, but fixing the issues felt hopeless.
Beatopia lyrically reminds us we don’t have to lock away our mistakes in fear of being anything less than perfect. Humans aren’t flawless, so women shouldn’t have to be. Society wants patient women full of compassion, but we deserve these virtues as well. Beabadoobee practices self-love in the wake of one of life’s most painful moments, leading the way in showing us how to take a step that seems impossible.
Image Courtesy: @radvxz on Instagram
Seeing our gut-wrenching emotions written out is unsettling, and it is even more unsettling to hear someone else sing them. Yet, today’s female indie front runners reassure us that, while professing our emotions and shortcomings seems scary, we are never alone in how we feel.
Of course, it isn’t easy to reveal our feelings to a world that generally dismisses women as “too emotional” whenever we speak up. But isn’t it time we make the world take us seriously? What if we redefine the “women are emotional” stereotype as a slogan for women’s freedom of self-expression?
Emotions are part of being human. If we learn to be honest and outspoken about how we feel, we can dismantle the expectations forced on us and rewrite the idea that women must put on a mask to be worthy of love and respect.
We’ve hidden for too long, and the music of Beabadoobee and Beach Bunny should inspire us to take back control of our emotions. Lock yourself in your bedroom, grab your phone, play Emotional Creature and Beatopia, and shout the lyrics at the top of your lungs. Your emotions are beautiful and universal.
Strike Out,
Writer: Daniella Alfonso
Editor: Kate Corcoran
Gainesville
