Finding Yourself in the Things You Love
Image Courtesy: Nathaniel Cooper
From a young age, I’ve always been obsessive about the things I love. From nerding out over Super Mario characters at 7-years-old, to my preteen years of idolizing YouTubers who will never know me and now stepping into my twenties, binge watching my same favorite movies over and over again and knowing entire discographies of my favorite musicians.
Although many may find it juvenile, I find comfort in seeing myself in the things I love.
Music
My favorite albums are the ones I relate to the most, all of which, a piece of my soul. “Midnights” by Taylor Swift, “Who’s the Clown” by Audrey Hobert and so many more. All of which are essential to the person I am today.
Yelling, “Oh my god—that’s so me!” at the first listen of a brand new album is a crucial part of my experience.
Every couple has “their” song, everyone has a “cry-in-the-car” song or the song they play to get ready. Every person has a song that holds meaning for them. I believe music is what carries us through life—in all various forms.
Image Courtesy: Nathaniel Cooper
Film & Television
I recall the first time I watched “Love, Simon” so vividly. I was 13-years-old and closeted, my family wasn’t home and the living room TV was to myself. Although severely anxious about getting caught watching a movie about a same-sex couple while not being out myself, I pressed play. Seeing it was possible to see someone like me have a successful coming-out story changed the way I viewed coming out.
Later, walking through a grocery store, I made a reference back to the movie and my mother picked up on it. She made it a point to let me know that she, too, had watched the movie and enjoyed it. To a closeted 13-year-old, this was everything. Now being out to my family and friends, I look back on the time I watched “Love, Simon” and see how essential this was to my coming out process, both before and after. Movies and TV shows like “Love, Simon,” “Call Me By Your Name” and “Heartstopper” were there as the representation I needed in a town where I couldn’t find it anywhere else.
Someone You Know
“I am a mosaic of everyone I’ve ever loved, even for a heartbeat.”
I heard this quote years ago and it has stuck with me ever since. I still buy the same kind of chocolate bar when I find it in the gas station, because my mother showed it to me when I was younger. I have a neon light-up sign hanging on my wall reading, “Babe, you look so cool,” from the song “Robbers” by The 1975, a gift from my hometown best friend when I was 18-years-old. I anxiously await for the “bonus scene” found after the end credits of superhero movies because my father taught me to do so.
I am merely fragments of those I love or have loved and I hope those that have loved me still carry my fragments with them. You are what you love and you are those that have loved you.
Strike Out,
Nathaniel Cooper
Editor: McKenna Edwards
Athens